From making the bed to mowing the lawn, there are many ways that children of different ages can help around the house. Chores are not only helpful for parents and guardians, but they are a great way to teach children such values as responsibility and work ethic. In addition, children not only learn how to do each specific task, they also learn skills such as time management. The Center for Parenting Education even states that participation in chores at home can lead to higher success in school, as students build self-esteem and learn to delay gratification.
However, many parents might agree that while chores are important, actually getting children to do them isn’t always easy. To help solve this problem, we’ve reached out to local parents and parent groups to round up their top tips for motivating kids to do chores.
Start early
One of the best ways to help children do chores is to start at a young age. In one local parenting group, grandmother April reminds us that even toddlers can do simple tasks such as putting away their toys, placing dishes in the sink or filling a pet’s bowl with food. When chores become a consistent part of children’s lives at a young age, they are more likely to feel like an expected part of children’s lives as they grow older.
Starting chores with your older children? Not a problem! It’s never too late with the tips below.
Consider age-appropriateness
While a bit of challenge is appropriate for children, a chore that isn’t appropriate for your child’s age will likely only frustrate you both. Wondering what chores your child is ready for? The Child Development Institute has created a list of age appropriate chores for all kids, from toddlers to high schoolers. Check it out here.
Be a clear and encouraging coach
Once you have decided on the right chores for your child, it’s helpful to make sure they know the how-tos of the task. While making the bed is an appropriate chore for a preschooler, they might need a little coaching to do it well.
One local mom, Teresa, suggested an ‘I do, We do, You do’ approach, saying, “When we start a new chore, I show them how to do it the first few times. Then we do it together, or they do it while I give prompts and feedback. Once they can do it without my help, they are on their own and we celebrate their great job!”
RELATED: Parents Experience Overwhelming Stress, Local Therapists Help
Be specific
Along with being a coach, local parents encourage you to be very specific with your expectations.
Jon, father of two, reminds us that “just because you know what you mean doesn’t mean your first grader does.” Give your kid explicit instructions about how the task should should be done, how often it should be done, and when it should be done.
Create a routine
Everything is easier once it becomes a habit. One mother, Hayley, recommends doing chores at the same time every day. For example, a child might load the dishwasher every day directly after dinner or lay out their clothes for the next day right after they brush their teeth at bedtime. Hayley shared her experiences, saying “We were really sporadic about chores until we found times that made sense and stuck with them!”
Find the system that works for you
Follow through can be one of the biggest challenges when it comes to chores. You start out strong, following all the tips above, but eventually find yourself drying those dishes yourself or wondering who was supposed to take out the trash.
Molly, mother of five, recently found that a chore chart was the key to success in their home. “We use a calendar page to place the chore and the name of the family member responsible for that chore every day. We fill it out together on Sundays and do our best to stick to it! The simple reminder of having it posted right in the kitchen really helps.”
While the parents we talked to differed on whether they thought children should be paid (or otherwise rewarded) for doing chores, those who advocated for rewards suggested that checking the chore chart when giving those rewards is helpful for making sure kids have actually stayed on top of their responsibilities throughout the week.
Make it Fun
So what do kids think? We interviewed a handful of children and teens and found that they feel the most motivated when their families make chores fun.
Wesley, 7, claims that he likes to listen to music and be timed while doing chores, saying, “It’s really fun when we can race with our chores and see who is the fastest.”
Izzy, 13, says she likes when her parents chat with her while she cleans, stating that it’s a “good time to catch up and talk about our days.”
Several parents encourage making games with younger children, such as letting them stand away from the laundry bin to “make baskets” with the clothing. Making chores fun can be a challenge, but don’t be afraid to be creative!
Author: Dr. Alyssa Whitford is a former K-12 teacher and current professor of education at Hope College in Holland, MI. She is passionate about literacy, social studies, and all things education. She is also a proud parent to two children of her own.
